Gifted by nature or nurture? Raising a star calls for deliberateness

When Kodi Taehyun Lee went on the stage of the 14th season of the reality competition show, America’s Got Talent, the odds were stacked against him. He could hardly speak or coordinate his movement and had to rely on his mother. Kodi was born with optic nerve hypoplasia which caused him to become blind. He was also diagnosed with autism at an early age. In addition to this, Kodi had Addison's disease. But Kodi also had a gift that his mother had nurtured from an early age: He had the perfect pitch. He could also play the piano efficiently.

By the time he left the stage, there was no doubt who the competition’s winner would be. Within two weeks, his audition had garnered over 50 million views and at the end of the competition, Kodi was declared the winner.

Kodi is one of the stars on the show whose talents and gifts were identified when they were babies. Darci Lynne Farmer, a child ventriloquist was crowned the show’s winner in the 12th season at the age of thirteen. Others such as ten-year-old Jackie Evancho who emerged second in the prestigious competition have gone on to become Billboard superstars. Since 2009, Jackie has released five albums, which include a platinum and gold album, and 3 Billboard 200 top 10 debuts. In 2010, she became the best-selling debut artist and the youngest solo artist ever to go platinum in US history. But Jackie had not always been a gifted singer. Her mother purchased a musical DVD after attending a theatre just before her eighth birthday. Evancho began to sing along the songs in that DVD under the instructions of her mother and gradually, perfected the art of classical singing. Her parents enrolled her in a classical music contest. Since then, the sky has been the limit for her.

The Williams sisters considered the greatest tennis duo in the world, started playing tennis at the age of five. Their talent was identified and nurtured by their father, who has remained their coach to date. Locally, Kenya has the Moipei sisters who began singing 14 years ago under guidance from their father Nicholas Moipei, then a musical trainer at Kianda School. According to their father, Nicholas, the sisters perfected their gift at home, with encouragement from their mother Christine, who is a music composer and singer.

According to child therapist Damaris Kamau, gifted acts have their gifts identified, nurtured, or instilled in them by their parents from an early age. She says that each child has something unique in them that a parent can harness, nurture or identify as a gift. She notes that you can identify if your child is gifted by paying keen attention to their behavioural traits as well as energy levels. “If a child is gifted, he or she will showcase more energy than the average kid,” she says. You may notice that your child is passionate about a certain activity like singing. “He or she may also be strongly connected to people to the point of being altruistic.” It is also possible for a parent to give a gift to their kids by facilitating the necessary resources for training. For example, if you think your child can be a gifted swimmer, enrolling them for professional swimming lessons will set them on the path to competing at the grand Olympics stage. However, you should not force your child into something they don’t like. “Your influence should come once you establish that they can be passionate about the new talent venture you want to start cultivating,” says Damaris.

Nurturing your child's gift

Follow your child's lead: Provide opportunities for the child to work with things he or she enjoys or is good at. For instance, if they enjoy singing, provide a simple musical instrument or a DVD they can easily sing along to.

Expand your child's interests: Expose your child to new things. Bear in mind that children only know or are familiar with what they have been exposed to. If they have never been exposed to music, for instance, they may not know they like it or are good at it. However, do not force them into areas they are not keen on.

Be creative: Provide them with ample opportunities to “think outside the box” such as making a plane from cardboard. You may also keep a variety of resources at home; e.g. paintbrushes and a paint box, plain white papers, crayons. Similarly, look for outdoor activities that will change the normal routine.                     

Traits to watch out for

According to Damaris, gifted children tend to exhibit certain behavioural traits which can assist you to identify what they are gifted in and, or how to nurture whatever talent they have.

• They learn faster, deeply, broadly and have strong concentration powers compared to their peers.   
• They tend to have outstanding memory with a larger knowledge base than most students. 
• They are curious, ask many questions, and have many interests, hobbies and collections.  
• They demonstrate high reasoning ability, creativity, and curiosity.
• They have a tendency to get cranky about not wanting to do things that bore or act sloppy, careless, and lazy. 
• They don't need much practice to master new concepts or skills.
• They tend to be physically behind their peers, emotionally oversensitive, perfectionists, challenging or rebellious to authority.